There’s plenty of advice out there for women on how to get the guy, but I was curious about what dudes in the real world actually find attractive and respond to in women. To find out, I asked 15 guys to share the most effective way a girl has hit on them, and if they couldn’t think of any situation that has already happened (because girls don’t ask guys out enough, in my opinion), I asked them what would the most effective way be. If you want to know how to make the best first impression when approaching a guy, these answers are pretty insightful.
Let’s Get Started
1. “SHE WALKED UP TO ME, WAS SUPER CONFIDENT AND ACTUALLY ENGAGED IN CONVERSATION.” It might sound cliche to say that confidence is key, but given that so many guys really do name it as their must-have quality in a woman, there’s actually a lot of truth to it. Guys love a woman who’s comfortable in her own skin and who goes after what she wants.
2. “IT’S HOT WHEN A GIRL COMPLIMENTS ME ON MY BLUE EYES OR MY SMILE.” This one is good for either sex; you can never go wrong with a (genuine) compliment. Guys like to feel noticed and appreciated just as much as we do.
3. “SHE JUST MADE EYE CONTACT WITH ME AND SMILED.” Those magazines and movies always tell you to keep it simple when it comes to guys, and this response just emphasizes that; all you need to do is keep it simple and be friendly! Couldn’t get much easier than that.
4. “WHEN A GIRL USES HUMAN TOUCH TO FLIRT AND IS VERY DIRECT, THAT’S A BIG TURN-ON.” These touches don’t have to be super intense or inappropriate—guys have boundaries that should be respected just as much as we do—but a simple touch on the arm and a smile will go a long way.
5. “PROBABLY BRINGING UP SOME KIND OF SPORT… LIKE A TOM BRADY PICKUP LINE WOULD WORK EVERY TIME.”This probably isn’t extremely shocking information to you, but a lot of dudes like sports and they really like when you’re into them too. If you don’t know anything about sports, don’t fake it, but if you do, feel free to show off your skills.
6. “JUST KNOWING SHE WAS INTERESTED WAS ENOUGH TO MAKE ME FEEL CONFIDENT ENOUGH TO SHOW MINE.” A common theme with girls successfully picking up guys seems to be just being clear about what your intentions are. This is pretty easy to understand given that no one wants to be rejected. Knowing that’s not going to happen takes a huge weight off.
7. “WHEN A WOMAN CHALLENGES ME, I LOVE IT. I APPRECIATE A WOMAN WITH SOME FIRE IN HER SOUL.” See ladies, don’t be afraid to voice your opinions and be honest! It’s better to be real and disagree than be fake in order to get along with a guy. Any guy worth your time will like th
at you’re not afraid to speak your mind.
8. “BEING THE AGGRESSOR AND ESSENTIALLY DOING THE UNEXPECTED IS HOT. OTHER GIRLS MAY CALL THAT SLUTTY, BUT I CALL IT BEING CONFIDENT AND KNOWING WHAT THEY WANT.” Why do we still call girls sluts in 2017? Don’t be afraid to go after what you want—and don’t apologize for it ever. A lot of guys are looking for exactly that quality.
9. “I LIKE IT WHEN A GIRL MAKES EYE CONTACT, TWIRLS HER HAIR, PLAYFULLY TOUCH/FLIRTS/JOKES WITH ME, JUST BASICALLY BEING LOUD AND CLEAR.” Once again, just be obvious that you’re into him! Subtle signals do not work well with guys, clearly. Are we noticing a theme here yet?
10. “A WELL-CRAFTED CONVERSATION IS BETTER THAN EVEN THE MOST CLEVER ONE-LINERS.” Being able to listen and get a feel for the guy is huge, too. Sure, small talk is fine to break the ice, but don’t be afraid to get deep if you meet someone you think you might have a real connection with. You never know what could happen.
11. “SHE ASKED ME TO WATCH ELF ON CHRISTMAS EVE. IT WORKED.” It’s always a good idea to go for things that are impossible to say no to, like Elf during Christmas time or ice cream in the summer. It sounds silly, but sometimes that’s exactly what makes it so endearing and irresistible. Show your quirky side!
12. “THE MOST EFFECTIVE WAY A GIRL HAS HIT ON ME WAS AT A BAR WHEN THIS GIRL GRABBED MY ARM AND SAID, ‘I WANT TO STEAL YOU AWAY FROM THAT GIRL YOU WERE WITH.’ I’D BEEN WITH MY SISTER, BUT IT WORKED.” This is proof that you can hit on a guy in any way with confidence and be successful. While you don’t want to make a fool out of yourself with a guy who’s not showing any signs of being interested, there’s nothing wrong with just putting it all out there.
13. “I LIKE IT WHEN SHE’S INTELLIGENT! BEING ABLE TO HOLD CONVERSATIONS AND NOT JUST GIVING ONE-WORD ANSWERS IS KEY TOO.” Part of being confident is being able to contribute opinions to a conversation, and this is crucial for successful first impressions with a guy. In fact, it’s crucial for any meaningful interaction you want to have with another human being. Show off your smarts!
14. “WHEN A GIRL IS GENUINE, LAUGHS A LOT AND HAS A SENSE OF HUMOR, IT’S SEXY. I LOVE WHEN GIRLS TALK ABOUT THINGS THEY’RE PASSIONATE ABOUT.” Don’t hold back your passions or your goals because those things actually impress the right guys, not scare them off. Just have fun with it, and don’t worry about embarrassing yourself.